Ask them how to spell their name. It may seem simple, but it shows respect and care for them.
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Meaning
This means that when you make sure you get someone’s name right, it shows them they are important to you.
Explanation
I’ve seen this happen many times. It’s not about how the name is spelled. It’s about why you ask. When you say, “I want to say your name right. Can you spell it for me?” You show that the person is important to you. You change the name from just a word into a way to connect. In work, in leadership, and in life, that connection matters the most.
Summary
| Category | Business (24) |
|---|---|
| Topics | respect (10) |
| Style | plain (10) |
| Mood | determined (2) |
Origin & Factcheck
This gem comes straight from Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People, specifically from a section often called “How to Remember Names.” While the exact year of that specific line became well-known is debated as the book evolved, the principle is pure, original Carnegie from the late 1930s in the United States. You won’t find it falsely attributed to anyone else because it’s so uniquely tied to his core philosophy.
| Author | Dale Carnegie (65) |
|---|---|
| Book | How to Remember Names (9) |
Author Bio
Dale Carnegie (1888), an American writer received worldwide recognition for his influential books on relationship, leadership, and public speaking. Among his timeless classics, the Dale Carnegie book list includes How to Win Friends and Influence People is the most influential which inspires millions even today.
Official Website |Facebook | X | Instagram | YouTube |
Where is this quotation located?
| Ask to spell the name; accuracy is respect in letters |
| Publication Year/Date: circa 1956 (course booklet) ISBN/Unique Identifier: Unknown Last edition. Number of pages: Common reprints ~32–48 pages (varies by printing) |
| Section Get It Right, Unverified – Edition 1956, page range ~10–12 |
Context
Carnegie didn’t just drop this line in a vacuum. It sits right in the middle of his six rules for making people like you. The context is all about the magic of a person’s own name. He argues that a person’s name is the sweetest sound to them, and this tactic of asking for the spelling is a practical, almost foolproof method to honor that sound and remember it well.
Usage Examples
How can you use this in real life? It’s easy when you meet someone with a name like Siobhan or Xavier, don’t just smile and stay quiet. Say, “Nice to meet you, Siobhan That’s a nice name. Can you spell it for me?” It helps you make a quick connection.
Client Onboarding: When you talk to a new client named Mr. Al-Mansoori, You can say, “Thank you for your time, Mr. Al Mansoori. I want to make sure I write your name correctly. Could you please spell your last name for me?.” this builds immediate trust and shows great care.
Team Management: A new team member introduces themselves. Saying their name again and checking the spelling, even if It’s simple, shows respect and makes them feel included from the start.
To whom it appeals?
| Audience | administrators (1), nurses (5), registrars (1), sales people (21), support teams (3) |
|---|---|
This quote can be used in following contexts: form fills,CRM updates,patient intake,hotel check ins,event registrations,customer support chats
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Common Questions
Question: Doesn’t asking for the spelling seem awkward or show that I wasn’t listening?
Answer: Quite the opposite. If you do it with genuine intent, it shows you were listening so closely that you care about the details. You should speak politely and show that you care about being correct.
Question: What if the name is really common, like “John Smith”?
Answer: You can still use the principle! With a common name, you might not ask for the spelling, but you can double check by saying, “Great to meet you, John Smith. Is that John with an ‘h’?” It’s the same underlying mechanism of showing care.
Question: Is this just a manipulation technique?
Answer: Only if your intent is manipulative. If your goal is to genuinely connect with and respect people, which is what Carnegie truly advocated, then it’s a tool for building authenticity. The other person can feel the difference.