You know, when Marshall Rosenberg said “Children learn respect by being respected,” he wasn’t just giving parenting advice. He was revealing a fundamental truth about human psychology. It’s a simple but profound idea that flips traditional parenting on its head. The way we treat our children directly teaches them how to treat others.
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Meaning
The core message here is that respect isn’t a lesson you teach with words; it’s a behavior you model through action. It’s a principle of social learning in its purest form.
Explanation
Let me break this down from my experience. We often think of respect as something we demand from children, right? “Respect your elders.” But Rosenberg’s genius was in seeing it as a two-way street. Children’s brains are like little sponges, and they are constantly absorbing how we interact with them. When we interrupt them, dismiss their feelings, or command them, what we’re actually teaching is that power dictates respect. But when we listen intently, value their opinions, and speak to them kindly—even when setting boundaries—we are demonstrating what respect feels like and what it looks like. They internalize that model. It becomes their default. It’s not about being permissive; it’s about being intentional with our own conduct. The real work is on us.
Quote Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Category | Education (260) |
| Topics | behavior (66), respect (76), values (51) |
| Literary Style | affirmative (75), minimalist (442) |
| Emotion / Mood | provocative (175) |
| Overall Quote Score | 87 (185) |
Origin & Factcheck
This quote comes straight from Marshall B. Rosenberg’s 2005 book, Raising Children Compassionately: Parenting the Nonviolent Communication Way. It’s a core tenet of his Nonviolent Communication (NVC) framework. You sometimes see similar sentiments floating around, but this specific phrasing is authentically his, born from decades of his work in conflict resolution.
Attribution Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Marshall B. Rosenberg (190) |
| Source Type | Book (4032) |
| Source/Book Name | Raising Children Compassionately: Parenting the Nonviolent Communication Way (135) |
| Origin Timeperiod | Contemporary (1615) |
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4032) |
Where is this quotation located?
| Quotation | Children learn respect by being respected |
| Book Details | Publication Year/Date: 2004; ISBN/Unique Identifier: 9781892005140; Last edition: PuddleDancer Press, 1st Edition, 48 pages. |
| Where is it? | Chapter: Teaching Respect, Approximate page from 2004 edition |