Don’t be afraid of enemies who attack you… it’s the friends who flatter you that you should really watch out for. This is a cornerstone of navigating relationships, both personally and professionally.
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Meaning
The core message is that overt criticism is easy to identify and defend against, while subtle, insincere praise can be a far more dangerous trap, disarming your judgment and leading you astray.
Explanation
Let me tell you, I’ve seen this play out so many times. An enemy’s attack? It’s like a fire alarm. It’s loud, it’s clear, and it gets your full attention. You know exactly how to respond. But flattery from a friend? That’s the silent, odorless gas leak. You don’t even notice it’s there until the whole place is toxic.
It works because it preys on our deepest need to be liked and validated. That little hit of dopamine when someone tells us we’re brilliant, we’re right, our idea is perfect… it feels so good that we turn off our critical thinking. We stop asking the hard questions. And that’s precisely when we make our biggest mistakes. The flatterer isn’t building you up; they’re building a cage around your objectivity.
Quote Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (3669) |
| Category | Wisdom (385) |
| Topics | flattery (3), honesty (27), relationship general (37), trust (147) |
| Literary Style | direct (414), memorable (234) |
| Emotion / Mood | cautious (33), serious (155) |
| Overall Quote Score | 76 (131) |
Origin & Factcheck
This gem comes straight from Dale Carnegie’s legendary 1936 book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, published in the United States. You’ll sometimes see it misattributed to biblical sources or other historical figures, but its origin is firmly in Carnegie’s foundational work on human relations and business strategy.
Attribution Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Dale Carnegie (408) |
| Source Type | Book (4032) |
| Source/Book Name | How to Win Friends and Influence People (99) |
| Origin Timeperiod | Modern (528) |
| Original Language | English (3669) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4032) |
Author Bio
Dale Carnegie(1888), an American writer received worldwide recognition for his influential books on relationship, leadership, and public speaking. His books and courses focus on human relations, and self confidence as the foundation for success. Among his timeless classics, the Dale Carnegie book list includes How to Win Friends and Influence People is the most influential which inspires millions even today for professional growth.
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Where is this quotation located?
| Quotation | Don’t be afraid of enemies who attack you. Be afraid of the friends who flatter you |
| Book Details | Publication Year/Date: 1936 original, Revised Edition 1981, ISBN/Unique Identifier: 9780671723651, Last edition. Number of pages: Revised Edition 1981, approx 291 pages |
| Where is it? | Part Four: Be a Leader, Chapter 6 |