Don’t fidget, nod excessively, or look around—it’s a game-changer. I’ve seen it transform nervous energy into powerful presence. This simple shift makes people lean in and listen.
Share Image Quote:It’s about how physical composure directly influences how others perceive your authority and confidence.
Let me tell you, this is one of those subtle power plays that most people completely overlook. We’re so focused on what we’re going to say that we forget our body is already having a conversation. Fidgeting, that constant nodding like a bobblehead, letting your eyes dart around the room… it all screams insecurity. It tells people you’re not fully present, that you’re uncomfortable in your own skin. But stillness? Stillness is a superpower. It creates a vacuum of attention. It says, “I am so confident in what I’m saying and hearing that I don’t need to fill the space with nervous energy.” It’s not about being a statue, it’s about being grounded. I’ve watched junior team members command a room just by mastering this one thing. It’s that powerful.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (4111) |
| Category | Career (230) |
| Topics | confidence (113), presence (86) |
| Literary Style | assertive (150), direct (443) |
| Emotion / Mood | calm (546) |
| Overall Quote Score | 76 (135) |
This comes straight from Leil Lowndes’s 1999 book, How to Talk to Anyone, published in the US. You sometimes see similar advice floating around in leadership circles, but this specific, crisp phrasing is all hers.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Leil Lowndes (235) |
| Source Type | Book (4670) |
| Source/Book Name | How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships (185) |
| Origin Timeperiod | Contemporary (1811) |
| Original Language | English (4111) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4670) |
Leil Lowndes writes about striking conversations with unknown people and how to put others at ease and maintain relationships. Her techniques are straightforward and practically usable that readers can apply immediately in their workplace, and everyday life. Her book list includes How to Talk to Anyone and Goodbye to Shy which have reached international audiences.
Official Website |Facebook | X | YouTube |
| Quotation | Don’t fidget, nod excessively, or look around. Stillness commands respect |
| Book Details | Publication Year: 1999; ISBN: 978-0-07-141858-4; Last edition: 2018; Number of pages: 368. |
| Where is it? | Chapter 9: Sticky Eyes, Approximate page 53 from 2018 edition |
Lowndes places this in the section about making a powerful first impression and being taken seriously. It’s not just about social etiquette; it’s a tactical tool for anyone who needs to be heard and respected, especially in professional settings where perception is reality.
Think about this in your next meeting. Instead of nervously clicking your pen, plant your feet flat on the floor and keep your hands relaxed. When someone else is talking, resist the urge to nod after every single sentence—it devalues the gesture. Just hold steady, maintain soft eye contact, and listen. You’ll feel the shift. It works for job interviews, client pitches, even difficult conversations. The goal is to project calm control, and it starts with what you *don’t* do.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Theme | Advice (757) |
| Audiences | managers (505), professionals (830), public speakers (12), students (3527) |
| Usage Context/Scenario | job interviews (4), leadership talks (117), presentations (8), public events (4) |
Question: Doesn’t this make you seem cold or unresponsive?
Answer: A great question. It’s a fine line. The key is *conscious* stillness, not rigid paralysis. You’re aiming for a calm, open posture. You can still smile, you can still use hand gestures deliberately. The point is to eliminate the *nervous* movement, not all movement.
Question: What if I fidget because I’m anxious? How do I stop?
Answer: Totally get it. The anxiety is real. The trick is to redirect that energy inward. Focus on your breathing. Feel your feet on the ground. Clasp your hands together loosely in your lap. It gives that restless energy a place to go without broadcasting it to the world. It takes practice, but it works.
Question: Is this about manipulating people?
Answer: I see it more as self-mastery than manipulation. You’re not tricking anyone. You’re simply choosing not to let your anxiety run the show. You’re presenting the most confident, capable version of yourself. That’s just good communication.
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