Emotional self-control—delaying gratification and stifling impulsiveness is the secret engine behind any real success. It’s not about being a robot, it’s about being the one in the driver’s seat. This single skill separates those who achieve from those who just dream.
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Meaning
At its core, this quote means that the ability to manage your own emotional impulses is the foundational skill for achieving anything worthwhile.
Explanation
Look, I’ve seen this play out so many times. We tend to think accomplishment is about the big, flashy moves—the brilliant idea, the killer presentation. But the real work, the *unsexy* work, happens in the thousand small moments where you choose to do the hard thing. It’s that moment you choose to work on the proposal instead of scrolling, or you bite your tongue in a heated meeting instead of firing off a sarcastic remark. That’s emotional self-control. It’s the operating system that all other productive software runs on. Without it, even the best ideas just fizzle out.
Quote Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Category | Success (341) |
| Topics | achievement (34), discipline (252), patience (51) |
| Literary Style | concise (408), didactic (370) |
| Emotion / Mood | calm (491), motivating (311) |
| Overall Quote Score | 80 (256) |
Origin & Factcheck
This comes straight from Daniel Goleman’s groundbreaking 1995 book, Emotional Intelligence, published in the United States. You sometimes see similar sentiments floating around, but this specific, powerful phrasing is Goleman’s.
Attribution Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Daniel Goleman (125) |
| Source Type | Book (4032) |
| Source/Book Name | Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (54) |
| Origin Timeperiod | Contemporary (1615) |
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4032) |
Author Bio
Daniel Goleman is a psychologist and bestselling author whose journalism at The New York Times brought brain and behavior science to a wide audience. He earned a BA from Amherst and a PhD in psychology from Harvard, and studied in India on a Harvard fellowship. Goleman’s research and writing helped mainstream emotional intelligence, leadership competencies, attention, and contemplative science. He co-founded CASEL and a leading research consortium on EI at work. The Daniel Goleman book list includes Emotional Intelligence, Working with Emotional Intelligence, Primal Leadership, Social Intelligence, Focus, and Altered Traits.
| Official Website
Where is this quotation located?
| Quotation | Emotional self-control—delaying gratification and stifling impulsiveness—underlies accomplishment of every sort |
| Book Details | Publication Year: 1995; ISBN: 978-0553375060; Last edition: 2005; Number of pages: 352 |
| Where is it? | Chapter: Passion’s Slaves, Approximate page 78 from 2005 edition |