Every man I meet is my superior in Meaning Factcheck Usage

Context

In the book, this quote isn’t just a nice thought. It’s a foundational principle for the entire section on how to make people like you. Carnegie argues that one of the deepest human desires is to feel important, and by approaching others with this mindset of finding their superiority, you directly fulfill that desire. It’s the engine behind his famous advice: “Become genuinely interested in other people.”

Usage Examples

So how do you actually *use* this? It’s a mental shift first, an action second.

• For a Manager: Instead of just directing your team, sit down with a junior developer and say, “You solved that bug in a way I never would have thought of. Walk me through your process.” You learn, and they feel valued.
• At a Networking Event: Don’t just hand out business cards. Ask the person, “What’s the most interesting challenge you’re working on right now?” and genuinely listen for the unique expertise in their answer.
• In Sales: Go beyond the pitch. Ask the potential client, “What’s the one thing your current provider just doesn’t get about your business?” Their “superior” knowledge of their own pain points becomes your roadmap to a solution.

Common Questions

Question: Doesn’t this just feed imposter syndrome? Constantly thinking others are superior?

Answer: It’s the opposite, honestly. Imposter syndrome comes from a place of fear and comparison. This comes from a place of confidence and curiosity. You’re secure enough in your own value to actively seek out and acknowledge the value in others. It’s additive, not comparative.

Question: What if the person genuinely doesn’t seem to have anything to teach me?

Answer: Then you’re not looking hard enough. I’m serious. It might not be a technical skill. Maybe it’s their patience in explaining something simple. Maybe it’s their unique sense of humor that defuses tension. The “superiority” isn’t always about intellect or job title; it’s about a unique human quality. The challenge is on you to find it.

Question: Is this manipulative?

Answer: Only if you’re faking it. The entire power of this principle evaporates if it’s not genuine. The goal isn’t to trick people into liking you; it’s to genuinely become a person who learns from everyone, which in turn, naturally makes you more likable and influential. It’s a win-win, not a manipulation.