Humans need to feel connected to others, and that connection isn’t just a nice-to-have. It’s a deep, psychological imperative that often gets activated most powerfully when things fall apart. When the chips are down, our instinct isn’t to isolate, but to band together, and that’s where we find a sense of belonging we often miss in our comfortable, modern lives.
Share Image Quote:At its core, this quote means that our deepest sense of community and belonging isn’t forged in times of ease, but in the crucible of shared struggle.
It’s a counterintuitive truth, right? We spend our lives chasing comfort and security. But what Junger is pointing to is this incredible paradox: we often feel more alive, more purposeful, and more connected when we’re facing a common threat or a common hardship. It strips away the superficial stuff—the status, the material possessions—and reduces us to our most human state: interdependent. It’s why veterans sometimes miss the war, not the violence, but the profound brotherhood. It’s why neighborhoods come together after a natural disaster. Adversity, strangely, gives us a gift—it gives us each other.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Category | Relationship (329) |
| Topics | adversity (4), connection (265), resilience (106), solidarity (2) |
| Literary Style | philosophical (434), plain (102) |
| Emotion / Mood | realistic (354), uplifting (157) |
| Overall Quote Score | 79 (243) |
This insight comes directly from Sebastian Junger’s 2016 book, Tribe: On Homecoming and Belonging. He’s a journalist and author, not a psychologist, but he synthesizes anthropology, history, and psychology to build this powerful argument. You’ll sometimes see similar sentiments floating around, but this specific, elegant phrasing is all Junger.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Sebastian Junger (60) |
| Source Type | Book (4032) |
| Source/Book Name | Tribe: On Homecoming and Belonging (60) |
| Origin Timeperiod | 21st Century (1892) |
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4032) |
Sebastian Junger is born in Belmont, United States on 1962. He studied cultural anthropology at Wesleyan University and built his career in journalism. He is the one of the leading contributor and editor at Vanity Fair. Along with Tim Hetherington, he codirected Restrepo(2010 American documentary), which went on to win Sundance’s Grand Jury Prize and an Academy Award nomination. The Sebastian Junger book list includes The Perfect Storm, Tribe, A Death in Belmont, Freedom, War, and In My Time of Dying, each marked by distinct writing style
| Official Website
| Quotation | Humans need to feel connected to others, and that connection often comes most powerfully in times of adversity |
| Book Details | Publication Year: 2016; ISBN: 978-1-4555-6638-6; Last edition: 2017; Number of pages: 192. |
| Where is it? | Chapter 3: In Bitter Safety I Awake, Approximate page 68 from 2017 edition |
Junger was exploring a painful puzzle: why do some soldiers have a harder time coming home than being in combat? He argues that modern society, for all its safety and abundance, has created a void of isolation. The book contrasts this with tribal societies and communities in crisis, where a clear, shared purpose and mutual dependency create a powerful sense of belonging that we’re evolutionarily wired for.
This isn’t just a nice quote; it’s a lens for understanding human behavior. You can use it when:
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Theme | Principle (838) |
| Audiences | leaders (2619), social workers (32), students (3111), teachers (1125), therapists (555) |
| Usage Context/Scenario | discussing resilience (1), exploring trauma recovery (1), motivating teamwork (1), talking about crisis unity (1), writing about empathy (1) |
Question: Does this mean we should seek out adversity?
Answer: Not at all. The point isn’t to go looking for trouble. It’s to recognize that when hardship inevitably comes, it contains this seed of connection. And more importantly, it’s a call to consciously build that sense of shared purpose and mutual support in our daily lives, without needing a disaster to trigger it.
Question: Is this connection always positive?
Answer: Great question. It can be a double-edged sword. This same mechanism is what fuels powerful, positive communities, but also what can bind people together in toxic groups like gangs or cults. The connection is powerful, but the context and values of the group matter immensely.
Question: How does this apply in our modern, individualistic world?
Answer: That’s the central challenge. We have to intentionally create it. Join a club, a sports team, a volunteer group. Find a project that requires collaboration toward a difficult goal. We have to manufacture the “tribe” that used to be a given.
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