Table of Contents
Meaning
The most effective way to connect with people is to genuinely validate their significance. It’s not about empty flattery; it’s about a sincere appreciation.
Explanation
You have to move from thinking “What can I get from this person?” to “What’s amazing about this person that I can learn about?” That’s the sincerely part. And the enthusiasm? When you’re genuinely curious, when you light up at learning about their project, their hobby, their perspective, people feel that energy. They remember the feeling they had when they were with you. It’s unforgettable.
Summary
| Category | Skill (85) |
|---|---|
| Topics | appreciation (9), connection (35), empathy (37), respect (16) |
| Style | direct (43), simple (29) |
| Mood | kind (2), uplifting (13) |
Origin & Factcheck
| Author | Dale Carnegie (162) |
|---|---|
| Book | How to Win Friends and Influence People (43) |
About the Author
Dale Carnegie, an American writer received worldwide recognition for his influential books on relationship, leadership, and public speaking. Among his timeless classics, the Dale Carnegie book list includes How to Win Friends and Influence People is the most influential which inspires millions even today.
Official Website
Quotation Source:
| Make the other person feel important, and do it sincerely; enthusiasm for people is remembered |
| Publication Year: 1936 original, Revised Edition 1981, ISBN: 9780671723651, 280 pages |
| Part Two: Six Ways to Make People Like You, Chapter 6:How to make people like you instantly, Page 104 |
Context
In the book, this idea is presented as one of the six fundamental ways to make people like you. It comes right after principles like becoming genuinely interested in other people and smiling. “enthusiasm for people is remembered” is an extension of the what is actually said in the book.
There is one all-important law of human conduct. If we obey that law, we shall almost never get into trouble. In fact, that law, if obeyed, will bring us countless friends and constant happiness. But the very instant we break the law, we shall get into endless trouble. The law is this: Always make the other person feel important.
Usage Examples
- For a Manager: In your next one-on-one, don’t just run down a task list. Ask, “What part of your work are you most excited about right now?” and then really listen to the answer. Your enthusiasm for their enthusiasm is a massive motivator.
- At a Networking Event: Instead of pitching yourself, ask the person, “What’s the biggest challenge you’re solving in your role?” and engage with that. You become memorable not for what you said, but for how you made them feel, like an expert.
- In Customer Service: A rep who says, “That sounds incredibly frustrating, thank you for bringing this to my attention so we can fix it,” is using this principle. They are validating the customer’s importance in that moment.
To whom it appeals?
| Audience | coaches (119), leaders (268), marketers (19), sales people (34), teachers (180) |
|---|---|
This quote can be used in following contexts: sales coaching,customer service training,leadership sessions,team communication,relationship building
Common Questions
Question: Can you tell me example from the book where it is applied?
Answer: A hotel manager who greeted returning guests by name and asked about their family created lifelong loyalty. Carnegie himself made a point of learning the names and personal details of restaurant staff; they would then run across the room to serve him.
Question: Isn’t this just people-pleasing?
Answer: Absolutely not. People-pleasing is about seeking validation for yourself. This is the opposite. It’s about offering validation to others. It’s an act of strength, not weakness.
Question: Can this work in a tough negotiation?
Answer: It’s especially powerful there. Acknowledging the other side’s pressures and constraints, making them feel heard and important. It builds the trust needed to find a creative, mutually beneficial solution.