Our emotions have a mind of their own Meaning Factcheck Usage
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You know, that idea that “Our emotions have a mind of their own”… it’s not just a poetic phrase. It’s a fundamental truth about how we operate. It explains so much of the internal conflict we all face daily.

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Meaning

It means your feelings aren’t just a messy byproduct of your thoughts. They are a separate, powerful, and often primitive processing system that can arrive at conclusions – and drive actions – all on its own, completely bypassing your logical brain.

Explanation

Think about the last time you snapped at someone and immediately regretted it. In that moment, your emotional mind – the part that feels threatened or disrespected – took the wheel. It hijacked the system. Your rational mind, the part that knows it’s counterproductive, was just a passenger watching it happen. That’s the independence Goleman is talking about. It’s not that you’re irrational; it’s that you have two parallel systems running, and the emotional one is faster and has a bigger, more immediate impact on your behavior. It’s like having an ancient, powerful alarm bell inside you that sometimes rings when there’s no real fire.

Quote Summary

ContextAttributes
Original LanguageEnglish (3668)
CategoryEmotion (177)
Topicsemotion general (105), mind (39), reason (8)
Literary Styleclear (348), scientific (57)
Emotion / Moodcalm (491), reflective (382)
Overall Quote Score77 (179)
Reading Level72
Aesthetic Score77

Origin & Factcheck

This is straight from the source. The quote comes from Daniel Goleman’s groundbreaking 1995 book, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, published in the United States. You sometimes see the sentiment floating around unattributed, but the specific phrasing is his.

Attribution Summary

ContextAttributes
AuthorDr Daniel Goleman (50)
Source TypeBook (4032)
Source/Book NameEmotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (54)
Origin TimeperiodContemporary (1615)
Original LanguageEnglish (3668)
AuthenticityVerified (4032)

Author Bio

Daniel Goleman is a psychologist and bestselling author whose journalism at The New York Times brought brain and behavior science to a wide audience. He earned a BA from Amherst and a PhD in psychology from Harvard, and studied in India on a Harvard fellowship. Goleman’s research and writing helped mainstream emotional intelligence, leadership competencies, attention, and contemplative science. He co-founded CASEL and a leading research consortium on EI at work. The Daniel Goleman book list includes Emotional Intelligence, Working with Emotional Intelligence, Primal Leadership, Social Intelligence, Focus, and Altered Traits.
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Where is this quotation located?

QuotationOur emotions have a mind of their own, one which can hold views quite independently of our rational mind
Book DetailsPublication Year: 1995; ISBN: 978-0553375060; Last edition: 2005; Number of pages: 352
Where is it?Chapter: The Emotional Brain, Approximate page 31 from 2005 edition

Authority Score92

Context

Goleman was synthesizing decades of neuroscience research for a popular audience. He was explaining how the brain’s architecture, specifically the low-road pathway from the thalamus to the amygdala, allows for emotional reactions to occur before the neocortex (the thinking brain) has even fully processed what’s happening. He was building the case for why we need to understand and manage this separate “mind” to be successful.

Usage Examples

This concept is incredibly practical. I use it as a lens all the time.

  • For a frustrated manager: When an employee misses a deadline, your emotional mind might scream “They’re lazy!” But understanding this concept lets you pause and engage your rational mind to ask, “What systemic issue or personal challenge might have caused this?”
  • For personal growth: When you feel a wave of anxiety before a presentation, instead of fighting it, you can acknowledge, “Ah, my emotional mind is trying to protect me from perceived social threat.” This simple reframe creates space to choose your response.
  • In marketing and sales: It reminds us that people make decisions emotionally and then justify them rationally. You have to speak to both minds.

To whom it appeals?

ContextAttributes
ThemeFacts (121)
Audienceseducators (295), leaders (2619), psychologists (197), students (3111)
Usage Context/Scenarioemotional intelligence workshops (23), leadership seminars (97), mental health awareness (23), psychology lectures (34)

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Motivation Score64
Popularity Score85
Shareability Score76

FAQ

Question: So, does this mean we’re not in control of our emotions?

Answer: Not at all. It means control isn’t about suppression. It’s about integration. You can’t stop the initial emotional spark, but you can build the capacity to manage the flame before it becomes a wildfire. That’s the core of emotional intelligence.

Question: Is the “emotional mind” always wrong?

Answer: Great question. No, absolutely not. It’s a source of intuition, passion, and gut feelings that are often incredibly valuable. The problem isn’t the emotion itself; it’s when it hijacks the system and doesn’t let the rational mind have a say.

Question: How is this different from Freud’s id and ego?

Answer: The concept is similar, but Goleman’s framing is rooted in modern neuroscience, not just clinical theory. He’s pointing to specific brain structures and pathways, giving a biological basis for what Freud described psychologically.

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