You know, when Leil Lowndes said “People trust those who make them feel understood,” she really nailed something fundamental about human connection. It’s not about being the smartest person in the room; it’s about making the other person feel like they’re truly being heard. This simple shift in focus is the secret sauce to building genuine trust, whether you’re leading a team or just trying to connect with someone new.
Share Image Quote:The core message here is that trust isn’t built on credentials or logic, but on the emotional experience of being validated.
Let me break this down for you. I’ve seen this play out a thousand times. When you actively listen and reflect back what someone is saying—not just the words, but the emotion behind them—you’re sending a powerful signal. You’re telling them, “You matter. Your perspective is valid.” And that, right there, is the foundation. It’s a psychological handshake. It’s the difference between a transactional interaction and a relational one. Once someone feels that from you, the walls come down and real trust can start to build.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (3669) |
| Category | Relationship (329) |
| Topics | empathy (143), trust (147), understanding (119) |
| Literary Style | clear (348), plain (102) |
| Emotion / Mood | calm (491), reassuring (55) |
| Overall Quote Score | 84 (319) |
This gem comes straight from Leil Lowndes’s 2003 book, How to Talk to Anyone, which was published in the United States. You sometimes see similar sentiments floating around, but this specific phrasing is uniquely hers from that work.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Leil Lowndes (235) |
| Source Type | Book (4032) |
| Source/Book Name | How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships (185) |
| Origin Timeperiod | Contemporary (1615) |
| Original Language | English (3669) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4032) |
Leil Lowndes writes about striking conversations with unknown people and how to put others at ease and maintain relationships. Her techniques are straightforward and practically usable that readers can apply immediately in their workplace, and everyday life. Her book list includes How to Talk to Anyone and Goodbye to Shy which have reached international audiences.
Official Website |Facebook | X | YouTube |
| Quotation | People trust those who make them feel understood |
| Book Details | Publication Year: 1999; ISBN: 978-0-07-141858-4; Last edition: 2018; Number of pages: 368. |
| Where is it? | Chapter 24: Mirror Emotions, Approximate page 104 from 2018 edition |
In the book, this isn’t some abstract philosophy. It’s presented as a practical, almost tactical, tool for building rapport. It sits among her 92 “tricks,” which are really just frameworks for being more charismatic and effective in your conversations, both professionally and personally.
So how do you actually use this? It’s simpler than you think.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Theme | Principle (838) |
| Audiences | counselors (241), friends (67), leaders (2620), teachers (1125) |
| Usage Context/Scenario | leadership coaching (130), personal development talks (31), relationship therapy (19), team bonding (6) |
Question: Is this just about repeating what someone says?
Answer: Oh, not at all. That’s parroting, and people see right through it. It’s about demonstrating empathy and comprehension. It’s about reflecting the core emotion or need they’re expressing.
Question: Can this be used manipulatively?
Answer: Technically, yes. Any powerful tool can be misused. But if your goal isn’t genuine connection, people will eventually sense the insincerity and trust will be destroyed, not built.
Question: What if I don’t agree with the person?
Answer: This is the best part. You don’t have to agree to understand. You can say, “I see why you see it that way,” or “I understand how that situation could make you feel that.” Understanding is not the same as capitulation. It’s the first step to a productive dialogue.
You know, I’ve seen this play out a thousand times. People trust those who make them feel seen because it’s a fundamental human need. It’s the difference between a transactional…
You know, “Trust is built on telling people the why” is one of those concepts that seems obvious once you hear it, but so few of us actually do it.…
When everyone knows WHY they are doing what they do, you unlock a powerful, almost automatic level of trust. It’s the secret sauce that transforms a group of people into…
People rarely forget how you made them feel understood. It’s a game-changer in business and life. Let me tell you why this simple idea is so powerful. Table of Contents…
People follow those who make them feel valued. It’s a simple truth, but one we forget constantly in the hustle of management and leadership. This isn’t about grand gestures; it’s…
You know, when Kiyosaki said, “In the Information Age, the most valuable asset you can…
You know, "The richest people in the world look for and build networks" isn't just…
Your days are your life in miniature is one of those simple but profound truths…
Discipline is built by consistently doing small things well is one of those simple but…
You know, the more you take care of yourself isn't about being selfish. It's the…
You know, that idea that "There are no mistakes, only lessons" completely reframes how we…
This website uses cookies.
Read More