Find the usage, author, meaning, and book of quote – The process of rising strong begins with the story we tell ourselves about what happened.
It is not the fall that shapes us most, but the story we tell ourselves afterward. That quiet voice in our head can either keep us stuck or help us grow, and that’s where our real power begins.
Share Image Quote:Table of Contents
Meaning
It means that what helps us recover from a setback is not the event itself, but the story we tell ourselves to understand what happened.
Explanation
We all fall at some point. A project doesn’t work out. A relationship ends. We miss an opportunity we hoped for. The fall itself hurts, but it is not the most powerful part of the experience. What really shapes us is what happens next, inside our own minds.
Almost immediately, we begin telling ourselves a story about what it means. We might think, “I’m not good enough,” or “This always happens to me,” or “I never get a fair chance.” That story becomes the lens through which we see ourselves moving forward. It can quietly hold us back, or it can become the starting point of growth.
When we pause and get curious about that story, when we question it instead of letting it define us, we create space for change. That is how setbacks turn into insight. It is the difference between being shaped by a failure and being strengthened by it.
Summary
| Category | Health (58) |
|---|---|
| Topics | healing (8), perception (6), story (1) |
| Style | didactic (54) |
| Mood | reflective (52) |
Origin & Factcheck
| Author | Dr Brene Brown (10) |
|---|---|
| Book | Rising Strong (6) |
About the Author
Dr. Brene Brown is the author Daring Greatly and The Power of Vulnerability. She researches and provides evidence based insights into practical tools to help people train themselves.
Official Website |Facebook | X | Instagram | YouTube |
Quotation Source:
| The process of rising strong begins with the story we tell ourselves about what happened |
| Publication Year/Date: 2015; ISBN/Unique Identifier: 9780812995824; Last edition. Number of pages: 336. |
| Approximate page, The Reckoning section |
Context
It is the first step in her three part Rising Strong process: The Reckoning, where you pause and notice what you are feeling; The Rumble, where you own the story you are telling yourself and gently question it; and The Revolution, where you choose a braver, more honest way forward.
Usage Examples
Think about using this when you see someone, or even yourself, stuck in a loop of self blame or victimhood after a setback.
- For a struggling team leader:A client presentation doesn’t go as planned. Instead of jumping to “My team is not capable,” pause and ask, “Did we miss preparing for their real concerns?” That’s a story you can learn from and improve.
- For a friend after a breakup: “I hear you saying the story is ‘I’ll never find love.’ What if we challenge that? What if the story is actually ‘that relationship taught me what I truly need’?”
- For yourself: When you mess up, pause and ask: “Okay, what is the story I’m telling myself about this right now? And is it 100% true?”
To whom it appeals?
| Audience | leaders (295), students (437), therapists (53), writers (19) |
|---|---|
This quote can be used in following contexts: writing workshops,therapy training,motivational sessions
FAQ
Question: Is this just positive thinking?
Answer: Not at all. This isn’t about pretending everything is fine. It’s about honestly facing the uncomfortable story you’re telling yourself and sitting with it long enough to understand what’s actually true.
Question: What if the story I’m telling myself is true?
Answer: That is possible. The goal is not to replace it with something more pleasant. It is to examine it carefully. Often the story is only part of the truth or missing important context. The willingness to question it is what builds real resilience.
Question: How long does this process take?
Answer: It is an ongoing practice, not a quick fix. For small moments, it might take minutes. For deeper wounds, it can take much longer. What matters most is beginning the process and staying curious instead of shutting down.