The way you listen is often more important… it’s a game-changer. This isn’t about being quiet; it’s about active, strategic listening that builds real trust and connection, making your words land with far more impact.
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Meaning
It means the quality of your attention often outweighs the quality of your advice. You build rapport not by talking, but by how you receive what others are sharing.
Explanation
Let me tell you, I’ve seen this play out a thousand times. People get so focused on crafting the perfect thing to say next, the killer point, the witty remark. But the real magic? It happens in the silence between their words and yours. When you truly listen—and I mean lean in listen, with your whole body and without mentally rehearsing your response—you’re sending the most powerful message of all: “You matter. I get you.” That validation, that feeling of being understood, is what people remember. It’s what builds the foundation for everything else. Your words, no matter how brilliant, are just noise without that foundation.
Quote Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Category | Skill (416) |
| Topics | empathy (143), listening (91), trust (147) |
| Literary Style | clear (348), minimalist (442) |
| Emotion / Mood | calm (491), reflective (382) |
| Overall Quote Score | 72 (65) |
Origin & Factcheck
This comes straight from Leil Lowndes’s classic 1999 book, How to Talk to Anyone, published in the United States. You sometimes see similar sentiments floating around, but this specific phrasing is hers—a core part of her 92 “tricks” for building better relationships.
Attribution Summary
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Leil Lowndes (235) |
| Source Type | Book (4032) |
| Source/Book Name | How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships (185) |
| Origin Timeperiod | Contemporary (1615) |
| Original Language | English (3668) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4032) |
Author Bio
Leil Lowndes writes about striking conversations with unknown people and how to put others at ease and maintain relationships. Her techniques are straightforward and practically usable that readers can apply immediately in their workplace, and everyday life. Her book list includes How to Talk to Anyone and Goodbye to Shy which have reached international audiences.
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Where is this quotation located?
| Quotation | The way you listen is often more important than the words you say |
| Book Details | Publication Year: 1999; ISBN: 978-0-07-141858-4; Last edition: 2018; Number of pages: 368. |
| Where is it? | Chapter: How to Be an Active Listener; Approximate page from 2003 edition: 56 |