True compassion means not only feeling another’s pain… it’s a call to action. It’s the difference between seeing a problem and actually rolling up your sleeves to fix it. Goleman hits on a crucial distinction that separates passive empathy from genuine, world-changing compassion.
Share Image Quote:At its heart, this quote is about the fundamental difference between empathy and compassion. Empathy is feeling *with* someone. Compassion is feeling *for* someone and then being driven to *do* something about it.
Look, I’ve seen this play out so many times. You can have a team member who’s genuinely empathetic—they feel the stress, they understand the frustration. But that’s where it stops. The truly compassionate leader or colleague? They’re the one who, after acknowledging the pain, asks “Okay, what’s one thing we can change right now to make this better?” They move from being a mirror to being a motor. It’s that shift from a internal state to an external action that makes all the difference. It’s what transforms a good intention into a tangible result.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Original Language | English (3669) |
| Category | Spiritual (229) |
| Topics | action (112), compassion (36), empathy (143) |
| Literary Style | clear (348), moral (11) |
| Emotion / Mood | hopeful (357), warm (182) |
| Overall Quote Score | 84 (319) |
This comes straight from Daniel Goleman’s landmark 1995 book, Emotional Intelligence, published in the United States. You sometimes see this idea, or something very close to it, misattributed to Buddhist texts or other spiritual leaders, and while the sentiment is universal, this specific phrasing is Goleman’s, rooted in his work on the psychology of emotion.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Author | Dr Daniel Goleman (50) |
| Source Type | Book (4032) |
| Source/Book Name | Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (54) |
| Origin Timeperiod | Contemporary (1615) |
| Original Language | English (3669) |
| Authenticity | Verified (4032) |
Daniel Goleman is a psychologist and bestselling author whose journalism at The New York Times brought brain and behavior science to a wide audience. He earned a BA from Amherst and a PhD in psychology from Harvard, and studied in India on a Harvard fellowship. Goleman’s research and writing helped mainstream emotional intelligence, leadership competencies, attention, and contemplative science. He co-founded CASEL and a leading research consortium on EI at work. The Daniel Goleman book list includes Emotional Intelligence, Working with Emotional Intelligence, Primal Leadership, Social Intelligence, Focus, and Altered Traits.
| Official Website
| Quotation | True compassion means not only feeling another’s pain but also being moved to help relieve it |
| Book Details | Publication Year: 1995; ISBN: 978-0553375060; Last edition: 2005; Number of pages: 352 |
| Where is it? | Chapter: The Roots of Empathy, Approximate page 125 from 2005 edition |
Goleman wasn’t just writing a self-help book. He was making a bold argument that our ability to understand and manage emotions—our own and others’—is a greater predictor of success than raw, cognitive IQ. This quote on compassion sits right in the middle of that argument, framing it not as a soft skill, but as a critical component of effective leadership, strong relationships, and even a healthy society.
This isn’t just theoretical. I use this framework all the time.
| Context | Attributes |
|---|---|
| Theme | Wisdom (1754) |
| Audiences | leaders (2620), nurses (25), parents (430), teachers (1125), therapists (555) |
| Usage Context/Scenario | charity programs (1), counseling sessions (13), emotional healing groups (2), empathy training (21), spiritual talks (76) |
Question: Is compassion the same as empathy?
Answer: No, and this is the key takeaway. Empathy is the feeling. Compassion is the feeling plus the desire to help. Empathy is the fuel, but compassion is the engine that actually moves the car.
Question: What if I feel moved to help but don’t know how?
Answer: The action doesn’t have to be heroic. Often, the most compassionate act is simply asking, “How can I best support you right now?” The intent to act, and the inquiry itself, is the core of it.
Question: Can this lead to burnout?
Answer: Absolutely, and that’s a critical point. True compassion includes self-compassion. You can’t pour from an empty cup. The action has to be sustainable, not a martyrdom.
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