We have to be brave enough to own our stories… it’s not just about bouncing back, it’s about forging a stronger self from the ashes of our failures. This is the heart of true resilience.
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Meaning
This quote is about the two-part alchemy of resilience: first, the courage to accept your whole truth, especially the messy parts, and second, the conscious decision to rebuild with that hard-won knowledge.
Explanation
Look, here’s the thing I’ve seen over and over. We think being brave is about not falling. But Brene flips that. Real bravery happens *after* the fall. It’s that moment you’re lying there, covered in the proverbial dirt, and you have a choice. You can pretend it didn’t happen, blame someone else, or shove the story down. Or… you can do the harder thing. You can own it. You can say, “Yep, that was me. I failed. I was hurt. I made a mistake.” That ownership? That’s the birthplace of real strength. It’s not about pretending you’re invincible; it’s about knowing you are vulnerable and choosing to get up anyway, now armed with a deeper, more honest understanding of yourself. The rising strong part isn’t a guarantee, it’s a practice.
Quote Summary
Reading Level36
Aesthetic Score86
Origin & Factcheck
This wisdom comes straight from Brene Brown’s 2015 book, Rising Strong, which she published in the United States. It’s a core tenet of her research on vulnerability and wholehearted living. You sometimes see similar sentiments about resilience floating around, but this specific, powerful phrasing is unequivocally hers.
Attribution Summary
Author Bio
Dr Brene Brown is the author of books such as Daring Greatly and The Power of Vulnerability. The TED talk and Netflix production based on her research reached out to millions of audience. She researches effects of courage and vulnerability in shaping people's work and relationships. She leads the Brené Brown Education and Research Group and provides evidence-based insights into practical tools to help people train themselves
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Where is this quotation located?
| Quotation | We have to be brave enough to own our stories and rise strong after we fall |
| Book Details | Publication Year/Date: 2015; ISBN/Unique Identifier: 9780812995824; Last edition. Number of pages: 336. |
| Where is it? | Approximate page, The Revolution section |
Context
In the book, this isn’t just a nice line. It’s the entire premise. Brown lays out what she calls the “Rumble,” which is that messy, uncomfortable middle phase where we wrestle with the story we’re telling ourselves about our failure or setback. Owning our story is the work we do in that rumble, and rising strong is the outcome.
Usage Examples
This is one of those concepts that’s almost universally applicable. I find myself coming back to it with:
- A colleague who bombed a big presentation: Instead of letting them spiral into “I’m terrible at this,” you can gently guide them to own the specific missteps (“I was unprepared for that one question”) and then build a better plan for next time. That’s rising strong.
- A friend going through a tough breakup: It’s about moving past “they’re a terrible person” to “Here’s my part in the dynamic that didn’t work, and here’s what I need to carry forward.” Owning that story is brutally hard, but it’s the only path to a healthier next relationship.
- Leaders in a company that’s had a public failure: The brave leader stands up and says, “We messed up. Here’s what we learned, and here’s how we’re changing.” That transparency builds immense trust and a culture that isn’t afraid to try.
To whom it appeals?
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FAQ
Question: Does “owning our story” mean blaming ourselves?
Answer: Absolutely not. This is the biggest misconception. Owning your story is about claiming your truth and your feelings, not about taking on unjust blame. It’s the difference between “I am a failure” (blame) and “I failed at this specific thing, and it hurts, and here’s what I can learn” (ownership).
Question: How is this different from just “getting back on the horse”?
Answer: “Getting back on the horse” can be a mindless, grit-your-teeth action. Rising strong requires a pause. It demands the vulnerable, internal work of processing what happened before you take the next step. It’s integrated growth, not just brute-force recovery.
Question: What if I’m not ready to be that brave?
Answer: That’s the most honest starting point. The bravery isn’t a prerequisite; it’s cultivated in the small moments. Start by owning a tiny, low-stakes story. Admit a small mistake out loud. The courage for the bigger things builds from there.
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